tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13993857.post113191755602276224..comments2023-10-31T04:39:27.712-07:00Comments on We Have Always Lived in a Homeschool: It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like...oh, crapLionesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08248105912379321811noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13993857.post-1132967740981537042005-11-25T17:15:00.000-08:002005-11-25T17:15:00.000-08:00Frally, that's what I'm trying to avoid. Honestly...Frally, that's what I'm trying to avoid. Honestly, sometimes I do better than others. At least I'm trying, eh?Lionesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08248105912379321811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13993857.post-1132965041684531132005-11-25T16:30:00.000-08:002005-11-25T16:30:00.000-08:00Reading that, I could swear I was reading my mothe...Reading that, I could swear I was reading my mother's story. She also was abandoned and adopted by crappy parents. Everything you mentioned was exactly the same...<BR/><BR/>Now, I'm speaking from the perspective of being her child so please don't take this the wrong way: My mother had a lot of justified self-pity about her experience, but unfortunately she let it get to a point where she was so wrapped up in her grief for the childhood she never had, she didn't realise she was making the same mistakes all over again with her own children (me and my brothers). In saying that, obviously, we were not abused to the same extent she was. I guess what I'm trying to say (without knowing you that well) is try and work through your grief so you can carry on loving your children. If it means cutting off your family members, do it! I've cut off poisonous relationships with family members, and although there is a period of grief, there is a humungous weight that lifts off your shoulders by doing so. You can also find power in your strength to be the one cutting the ties, as hard as it may seem. If you keep trying to forge a relationship with an abusive person, you are teaching these people how to treat you and encouraging their abusive behaviour. I sometimes have moments of grief about the bad things that have happened in my life, but every time I catch myself doing that I start running off a list of things I have that I should be thankful for eg. My children, my husband, etc etc. The good will always outweigh the bad!<BR/><BR/>Sorry for prattling on so long...Frallyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17675354826656796981noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13993857.post-1132802241324788202005-11-23T19:17:00.000-08:002005-11-23T19:17:00.000-08:00And I thought my parents were bad. I certainly do...And I thought my parents were bad. I certainly don't know everything about you and your family, but from what I've learned, you seem to be doing a decent job for yourself and your children.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13993857.post-1132374528986352692005-11-18T20:28:00.000-08:002005-11-18T20:28:00.000-08:00I just want you to know how much I respect and app...I just want you to know how much I respect and appreciate you. Even before reading all that.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12765259892672951327noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13993857.post-1132152883330784982005-11-16T06:54:00.000-08:002005-11-16T06:54:00.000-08:00I am sorry that I hadn't read this earlier...but w...I am sorry that I hadn't read this earlier...but wanted to chime in. You are really at the most healthy point in your whole life...able to see the truth for the truth. You were handed some shitty cards, I agree. But that fact that you actively sought a "better hand" shows so much strength. <BR/> I had wonderful mom & Grandmothers, all of whom died way too early. I'm an only child, and sometimes the holidays depress me too. But, I have a wonderful life, and would rather have NO ONE than someone who was so selfish. <BR/>DOn't grieve your Mom, because she isn't worthy of the energy. You know it is an act in futility anyway, so just "discard" the relationship. We all have the power to do that with toxic people...and it is so good for our mental health! <BR/><BR/>Move on, and look ahead. Seek out and develop friendships with GOOD people, and enjoy your children. Find joy in the fact that you are one of the rare few strong enough to not perpetuate the cycle of abuse. The holidays of the future, with your children's children and families, will be more wonderful than you can imagine! LIghting a candle for you...Angelahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04016672238795146767noreply@blogger.com